Reply to Dating a man who is separated, what do I need to know?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a guy who went through this, I had put a lot of effort into personal counseling and couples counseling during the brief marriage. I knew what I wanted, and my ex was unwilling to work on her issues. After it reached the point where I gave her an ultimatum and we agreed to divorce, she moved out and away.

I started dating while I was separated because I was emotionally comfortable with myself and what had happened, and I knew that I wanted to be in a relationship and wanted to have children.

The fact that I was only separated was a deal-breaker for some women. For others it wasn't. I started dating my DW before the divorce was finalized, and my being separated wasn't an issue for her. She understood where I was emotionally regarding my previous marriage, and the I was sufficiently over that relationship to date her. We're now married.

This is a long way of saying it can work, and you should evaluate the guy based on his circumstances. While the warnings from DCUM are valid, you should use them to inform your decision, not instead of making your own decision.[/quote]

Seeing someone just like you and we are already talking marriage. We both know what we really want and this outcome wasn't initially sought but fell into place naturally.[/quote]

You sound a lot like my husband! Except that he was married for 10 years, the limit he set for himself on the day he married his pregnant then-girlfriend.  He put his all into making the marriage work, but shortly before the ten year mark, she asked for a divorce. It had been over for a long time before that though. We began dating months after he moved out, were married 2 years later, just had a baby....

Be very cautious, but you don't need to automatically write him off.

So [/quote]

He was married to his ex wife much longer than you, so be careful what you say. Glass houses and all.[/quote]

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