Reply to WHY does my DH expect me to thank him profusely for any chore he does around the house?

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Reply to "WHY does my DH expect me to thank him profusely for any chore he does around the house?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Because you haven't trained him properly. He needs to be taught that he's not doing all these things for YOU, but for himself, for the house, for the family, of which he is a member.

However, based on what you said in your OP about him thinking he is a caveman, it sounds like he is untrainable. Sadly, I must recommend divorce. [/quote]

I love my husband very very much. But he has APPALLING - and similar - habits in the bathroom. And we only have one bathroom. We fought about them all the fucking time. I thought about going on a cleaning strike, but I think he actually wouldn't have noticed - so I'm the only one who would have suffered. We fought about it way too much; I'd say that the bathroom habits and the fighting were both bad for our marriage.

I can tell you what I did: I started calling him into the bathroom to clean up his mess every time I found it there. If he left a pool of piss on the floor, I called him in to wipe it up. When there were shit stains on the toilet, I called him in to clean it up. He fought with me, he claimed not to see these little presents - and eventually he figured out that cleaning this crap up himself would lead to less fighting. Now, for the most part, he cleans up after himself. It was essentially like housebreaking a puppy. And took just as long.

There's still occasionally a pretty big pool of urine at the base of the toilet. When it's there, I call him in to clean it up, and he does. We are much, much happier now.

I do also try to be judicious about which battles I pick. If there are just pee spots on the bathroom floor, I clean them up myself; I don't want him getting so resentful about me noticing his spots that he either starts disliking me or feeling like he's being asked to meet an unreasonable standard. (Men are fucking gross.)

I feel like by posting this, I am more or less guaranteeing that we are going to fight about the bathroom tonight. Oh well. Good luck, OP.[/quote]

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