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Reply to "have a very obese sibling"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]Would it be helpful to you for a family member to rub your face in what (they view) are your own bad choices? Do you really need them to point out your failings to you? How you could do things better (like them)? Or would you find that to be highly intrusive, even insulting? Think about your own failings and how you want others to treat you.....think about what you really hope to accomplish before you speak. [/quote] Please. This is not a matter of "I want you do me like me" or "do things my way." It's not a matter of opinion. Morbid obesity is not healthy. As for how I want others to treat me - if I am acting in a way that could be harmful, I'd expect my loved ones to approach me with their concerns. Not harangue me, not lecture me, not scold me, but to tell me that they are concerned for me. In fact, if they didn't care, I'd expect them to say nothing. Do you routinely not express concern for your loved ones? [/quote] The one thing that I have learned is that not everyone handles a health problem/challenge/personal issue in the same way that I would handle it. In fact, it used to drive me nuts to see them make such obvious, asinine "mistakes" (BAD choices). At some point, I realized that those people have a right to live their own life and they will need to live with the consequences of their choices - both good and bad. I can not live their life for them, and their life is not mine to live. If I thought that they were incompetent/mentally ill I would, of course, try to step in and help them. But, otherwise, I butt out. If they ask my opinion I offer it but I no longer ASSume that I know better for them. I just know what is best for me - and that is where I try to put my energy. [/quote]
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