Reply to My 16 year old daughter is extremely immature

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think there’s been a lot of misunderstanding here. [b]Our family dynamic isn’t relevant to this issue[/b] 
[/quote]
Well, since you know what's up why are you asking DCUM? The fact that there is near universal agreement that your family dynamic has an impact should tell you something.

Some of what you say doesn't add up- she is responsible enough to watch and take young siblings out, and she can meal plan but she can't plate food or cook? That makes no sense. It does sound like behavior that a teen might exhibit who feels she didn't get enough attention from parents or was pushed out of "baby" too soon. My oldest definitely felt that she didn't get her fair share and still wanted tuck ins on college break, for example.

Holding onto a childlike sense of whimsy that co-exists with developing life skills is a good thing. I wouldn't put her down for that. But I think she probably needs less sibling responsibility, more parent attention, and a therapist to talk with about why she doesn't have friends. It is very unusual for a teen not to have at least a couple of close friends. She may have anxiety or she may have missed out on important development because she was overly entrenched at home. I'm not going to use the parentifying word here, although it's a possibility. It's also possible to just not realize that your kid is overly entrenched in home life and needs scaffolding to build an exterior social life.

I know you don't want to hear that you or your family are part of the equation, but families usually are. This doesn't mean you are terrible parents but it means you need to put the brakes on now and course correct.[/quote]

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