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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A lot of these divorces happened because women got sick of taking care of them. It's exhausting and men weren't picking up their slack. So many of my divorced friends say that now when their kids go to dad's house, it's the first free time they've had since kids were born. Clearly men liked having a built in housekeeper and they want to replicate that. [/quote]

+ a million

These men don't want to get their lives together on their own, they want a woman to swoop in and do it for them.

I would only marry a divorced guy if he'd been living on his own for at least two years, with a functioning household he'd set up himself. Same standard I'd use for a never-married guy -- I want him to show me that he's capable of figuring out how to keep a house clean, feed himself a healthy diet, maintain his own social life, etc. I do not want a "project" or to rescue some idiot man from himself. If he has kids (and personally I wouldn't marry a man with kids), I'd want to see that he has fatherhood on lock, good relationships, shows up for them, no chaos around scheduling and school and his kids are doing well with friends and activities and normal lives. I'd want to see a good relationship with the ex, too -- functional co-parents who don't bad mouth each other to their kids, make decisions in an equitable and functional way, etc.

If you have a savior complex and get a kick out of a man coming to you looking for you to complete and fix his life, take a moment and imagine that YOU are sick or injured and need someone, not even to take care of you, but just to manage your household and kids on his own without you for a little while. You think this man desperate for a replacement wife ASAP is going to be able to do that?[/quote]

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