Reply to Tired of the name calling

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The frequency of his comments, the use of gestures and the lack of remorse all suggest this is unfixable and goes way beyond the stress all new parents face.

I would stop talking to him about your feelings, stop debriefing and stop trying to create intimacy. I would insist on a separation and explain that you plan to eventually divorce. Keep it simple: You can say that as a mother you cannot let a growing child witness this or god forbid be subject to it. He will say you’re exaggerating, you’re selfish, kid will never hear, etc. but do not waver or get sucked into an argument.

After a few months you can consider what it would take to rebuild, but I don’t think he loves you or family life enough to put in the work to fix himself. He will always believe he isn’t crossing the line into misogyny or verbal abuse, but he is. And once he is comfortable seeing himself as the victim, financial or romantic betrayal is around the corner.

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Say more. What interesting insight! What is it about people who live in victimhood that sets them on a path toward financial and romantic betrayal? I agree with you wholeheartedly. Would just love to know more.[/quote]

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