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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m happily (re)married so I haven’t dated in well over a decade, but my cousin is newly divorced and very confounded by feedback she’s gotten as she ventures “out there”.

She’s an attractive 50 year old who looks younger, is fit, and dresses fashionably without being ridiculous. She’s well-educated, well-travelled, and successful in her career. She has pretty standard hobbies and interests.

She has one adult child in the military who hasn’t lived at home since he left for boot camp five years ago. And one very chill medium sized dog.

There’s no drama with her ex. He was wanted to live in his native country after their son left the nest. She did not. The pandemic kept them apart for over a year. After trying to revive things long distance for a few years, they amicably separated. She never bad mouths him. He doesn’t pay alimony or anything.

She expects to split the expenses of dating.

I say all this to explain that I am also confused by the feedback she is getting from both dates and a dating coach. She’s being told that the getting to know you activities on dates don’t matter to men over 50. [b]They prefer first date sex and if it’s a good experience, they’ll invest time in a second date. [/b]

If this is true, it seems like a considerable acceleration from the third date norm when I was last dating. I asked DH about his few single friends’ expectations. He said expecting and getting are two different things and most of them are smart enough to not write off a good woman simply because she didn’t sleep with them on the first date. My single brother said that the dynamics are weird where he lives because older single men considerably outnumber older single women.

If you are dating, is it really like that? 
[/quote]

I wouldn't do that (50+ guy). I actually would like to know the lady first. [/quote]

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