Reply to Coach Asking for Our U13 Cell Numbers to Communicate Directly

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[quote=Anonymous]About seven years ago a club I was associated with required all coaches, both house and travel, to take preventative abuse training.  From the coach’s perspective it was how to not put oneself in a legally compromising position even if your intentions are pure.  And for parents and kids, it was how to identify predatory behaviors that may not always be based on good intentions.  There are many ways to support kids but there are clear red lines that should not be crossed.   I found the training to be incredibly insightful as it described how bad actors work in a sports system to isolate and prey on certain kids and their families.  The intent of a bad actor is to find one kid that usually fits a particular profile and then isolate and manipulate the kid and parents through positive feedback, inappropriate communications, and ultimately through offerings that do not match what is normal across the team (offering rides or other accommodations to the family), which leads to the bad actor taking liberties with the child.  Common attributes are kids with certain indicators for social awkwardness within groups, and kids of single parents or who come from a lower socio-economic status.  Other kids and parents on the same team are not the target of the bad actor but will simply play a reinforcing role that "the system" is normal and safe, until it is too late.  But don't take my word for it.  I would consider reaching out to the organization that offered training to our club (see link below).  I have since gotten out of coaching, so I don't know if there are other resources available today.  I can tell the OP of this thread that what was described is potentially very suspicious and a coach that isn't open to listening to your concerns or is punitive in response to raising these concerns is likely a coach to be avoided in the first place.  Your instinct to protect your kid or somebody elses is good.  Don't be that parent who doesn't speak up and then regrets the future.

https://abusepreventionsystems.com/[/quote]

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