Reply to MIL refers to my son as "her baby," won't leave us alone

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]13:17 (first of two at that time) here:  As someone whose only grandparent left is elderly and can't help out, I get a little taken aback when I see these types of posts, because when my older siblings had kids, my mom was able to really help them out.  So I am unable to connect with what you are feeling.  I would love an intrusive and loving grandparent to help out and give me unsolicited advice.  Big deal, when she's gone, you shake your head and say some cute things about how she's so trying to be helpful.  She can go to grandparents day at the kids school - mine never had that.  [/quote]

My dad is gone and my mom lives on the other side of the country.  We used to live with my mom.  OP's post describes my MIL perfectly.  There is, as a PP said, too much of a good thing.  The only kicker I have on OP is that MIL used to come over unannounced AND LET HERSELF IN OUR HOUSE WHEN WE WERE HOME!

I like the other PP's suggestions about channeling the energy.  And I get the "my baby" thing - it took a while but now I just have gotten over it.  We went through a +/- 2 year period of really pushing back and creating space, and now we have a nice balance of her helping when we want, as opposed to her being around all the time and constantly assuming/acting like we can't do anything for ourselves (after I had #2 the first time one of us was going to be alone with both kids we had to argue with her not to come over and convince her we could handle 2 kids alone).[/quote]

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