Reply to Are there any studies of what eldercare does to the primary caregiver’s brain?

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Reply to "Are there any studies of what eldercare does to the primary caregiver’s brain?"

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[quote=Anonymous]We cared for an elderly family member in our home for the past year.  We loved her and I don't regret a minute of it, and also:
We both physically injured ourselves doing what needed to be done, even though we had training,
We didn't feel that we could have visitors in the house, even for an afternoon (so I bowed out of hosting my book club, neighborhood gatherings etc.)  The smells were difficult. She liked to spend her time in front of the TV in our main gathering room.
We didn't travel that year.
We spent more than $20,000 out of pocket that year for co-pays, assistive devices that were not covered, etc.
We hired a sitter to come one day every other week to give us a break.
Again, we don't regret a minute of it but it was really hard - emotionally, physically, in every way.  
I haven't seen any imaging studies of caregivers' brains but there must have been some changes.  
We're just 3 months out (she died in January) and I'm still feeling the effects.
Both of my grandmothers died at home being cared for by my mom, but they were in their 70's and the daughter (my mom) was in her 50's.  (You can do the math)..With better medicine these days (pacemakers, blood pressure & cholesterol meds) people are living into their 100's with daughter/caregivers in their 80's, if they survive the experience.  I know of two women facing this right now.
Thanks for the opportunity to tell it like it is.  People want to make us out to be saints or angels for doing this.  That doesn't help.
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