Reply to My sister is naturally better than me in EVERYTHING. Is it bad that I wish I could outdo her ?

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Reply to "My sister is naturally better than me in EVERYTHING. Is it bad that I wish I could outdo her ?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, think about how you use the word “better.” Isn’t the word “different” also accurate?

Consider whether you want to beat your sister or maintain a lifelong relationship with her.

My sister is (and always has been) a natural, classic beauty. She is athletically gifted and landed a massive scholarship to an exclusive college/university. She married a nice guy who has done extraordinarily well financially.

I realized in high school that what appears to be good fortune comes with a cost. As long as I can remember, people made incorrect assumptions about her without knowing her (she was a snob, she was mean/dumb, she skated by on her looks — none of which were true).

Have you thought about therapy? I mean this with deep compassion and kindness. People have essentially asked me outright why I never hated my sister. I grew up with parents who, to this day, never demonstrated a hint of favoritism or compared us publicly, and always encouraged us and celebrated our successes. I think that’s a huge part of the equation here.

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DP
Sounds lie you had good parents.  My parents compared us to each other and everyone else.  When we did well they would point out someone that did better, even when the comparison was absurd.

I'm trying to be more like you and have to fight the impulses of my youth all the time.  I think I have brain damage from it.[/quote]

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