Reply to Did anyone realize that they don't really like their parents all that much?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, do you have kids? Once I had kids I understood how much parents love their children and it changed my perspective on my parents. I appreciated them more because I knew how they felt about me[/quote]

Not OP, but for me having kids has really made me wonder how my mother could be so hurtful and cruel without apology or remorse. I cannot imagine hurting them that way. I had such conflicting emotions about exposing them to grandma even if her behavior with them was better, she could not completely hide who she is.[/quote]

Same here. I think the “when you have kids” things can swing both ways depending on what exactly transpired between mother and daughter. As my child grew I had to grieve all over again for how I was treated. All my life I had sort of wondered if maybe having a child would make me understand my mom better. Instead it just left me aghast at how she could treat me with such disdain. I realize the person she was belittling (me) was so so little. I remember crying in the dark at night at 4,5,6 years old after another contemptuous exchange from her and just could not imagine doing that to my child, leaving her crying to put herself to bed at night. [/quote]

Are they any better now? Maybe they were just overwhelmed then. Is it a pattern that has followed them into your adulthood or are you just holding your childhood over their head for the rest of their lives?[/quote]

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