Reply to Is your 8 year old miserable to be around?

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[quote=Anonymous]You should look into parent behavioral coaching — look up Mindy Grass, MrChazz, etc (on insta). It is normal for kids for test boundaries of what is right and wrong - your job is to guide, model behavior. She is clearly having a bad day, so why not ask her how she is feeling?

I think you should also look into a therapist for yourself. fya, your reaction (and your daughter’s reaction) is called parentifying — instead of you giving her emotional space and guidance, you had and outburst (crying, “cold shoulder”) and has to soothe you. That is really unhealthy and damaging long term. I grew up with an emotionally immature mother who felt every normal child behavior was a personal attack on her, and my whole life became about making her happy. It destroyed my life for many years and has ruined our relationship. She is still relatively young so there is time to change

Maybe also read “Adult Children of Emotionally Immatue Parents” and see if anything resonates. It is likely something you learned from your parents and it will take effort for you to break the cycle [/quote]

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