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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would not be willing to force or punish my kid over the refusal to spend time with the other parent. It would damage my relationship with my kid. The other parent is welcome to come over and try to coerce them or to spend some time trying to repair their relationship with the kid. Or they can pick the kid up from school or some other neutral location so that it isn't my problem.

Often times kids have good reasons for doing this, or the other parent simply does not have realistic parenting expectations. At that age, they don't spend a whole lot of time at home or with their parents, at all period.

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+100. My ex seems to have zero understanding that he needs to put in effort to maintain a positive relationship with our kid. Instead he just feels he is entitled to “his” time and gets mad at me and kid when kid drags his feet or expresses that he doesn’t want to go. [/quote]

So much this. My ex won't let our teen participate in social events and disallows him from attending school and sports events during HIS time. He's got a closet-sized bedroom him with twin blow-up mattresses that are too short for him (meanwhile he drives an exotic car and pats zero child support or share of his expenses because when I tried to enforce it in the past, he took it out onnput kid).  Just recently he left our kid alone in a dangerous place promising he'd be there for pick up at a certain time, leaving him alone, in the dark, for 45 minutes until I finally got a call and picked him up.   It's so bad that I wouldn't dream of bad-mouthing my ex to my kid - the tragedy is staring him in his face 24/7.  If anything, I’ve made excuses for my ex over the years to our son to protect him. I doubt I’m alone. The psycho poster on all these forums who claims it is the responsible parent’s fault when a kid pulls back is delusional.  Our kid pulls back from his dad because he feels unsafe, discarded, and isolated from the things he cares about when he's with him.  
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