Reply to Ten-year-old boys -- mind blown

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Reply to "Ten-year-old boys -- mind blown"

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[quote=Anonymous]I do think like attracts like, OP. My kids and their friends at 10 years old were generally a lot calmer. One of my kids has inattentive ADHD, which means he's a quiet day dreamer. We've had a couple of hyperactive guests. They were a handful!

I also think you're conflating multiple issues: hyperactivity and age-appropriate manners associated with how familiar they are with your routine and home layout.

No 10 year old I know has ever asked where to put their dishes or cleaned up, and I don't expect them to because I have my own system for tidying up. I do wish kids would remember to put trash in the trash can, which they probably do in their own home, but in mine, they might not feel comfortable going to the trash can if they don't visit often. I've seen kids ask where the trash can is (it's not obvious in our house), and I've seen kids leave their trash where it was without asking. My children's best friends cleaned up when they grew to be teenagers, because they were older and had grown to be familiar with my house and routine.

However the part where a kid asks 20 times for something, or needs instructions repeated multiple times... that is ADHD. You need to be firm when that happens, and parent that kid exactly like you would your own.

- parent of teens and young adults.

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