Reply to Ranking of the grandkids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s a Free Pass to not expend any mental or financial effort if ever she needs it in her old age, OP. You can explain this to your family, including her, if ever it comes up.

Distance yourself from your mother and explain to your kids, nieces and nephews that they are all wonderful humans, that you love them all to bits, and that their Grandma was wrong to rank them.

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I do this already.  We spend about 5 days a year with them.  [b]I'm so angry that she would do this.  
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She is always saying how Larla (the second to last) is just like me.  Always.  I always correct her "no, she's John's kid. She's just like John"[/quote]

PP you replied to. I know this is an emotional subject, but you're only hurting yourself. This is only to be expected, right? She is how she's always been. Every relative is fair game to her, even minors. If I were you, I'd relay the information to your siblings, in an FYI sort of message. If they choose to do nothing, that's their decision. And I wouldn't correct her in that way - the children are not little copies of one of their relatives. They have their own identity. Let's not compare, period.

It's going to be OK, OP. YOU are a good parent. Your children are not your mother's victims, day in, day out, like you were. And I hope your nieces and nephews have good parents as well. When you think about it, their grandparents only have a very limited influence on their development. It's you who is hurting most, perhaps, because she's making you relive childhood trauma.
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