Reply to How to disclose past sexual abuse to adult siblings

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[quote=Anonymous]It's the OP. Thanks for sharing your stories, I am sorry to hear about others who experienced this type of abuse as a child. It is traumatic and life changing.

Re siblings or family may not respond as I expect. Yes and I agree it's important to be ready for that. I'd be really surprised if he abused my siblings. It seemed to be more about the opportunity. I was also the only one who was asked/told to work in our family business as a teenager. My father was so verbally and emotionally abusive to me in that setting that I attempted suicide at age 15, I just could not take being told that everything I did and was doing was wrong, the implication that I was no good. After my suicide attempt, my mother was angry at me, saying "what would our neighbors and friends think if they found out?!"

The request for elder support has started. My dad sent out an angry email yesterday asking why we cannot visit even a few times a year, implying we are all undutiful and ungrateful children.  It makes me want to vomit.

My younger brother responded and suggested the 4 of us adult children commit to a regular monthly visit using a Google calendar so that every week, the parents receive a social visit. I replied it was not feasible for me to commit to a Google calendar of scheduled visits and would visit when I could.

I also said if anyone wants to understand why I'm not able to comply with the request, they can feel free to reach out to me. I don't expect anyone to - I've always been the scapegoat , the black sheep - and they'll just chalk it up to me being difficult or self-centered. If you have family members who have narcissistic tendencies, you'll understand.

Working on finding a therapist in the meantime.[/quote]

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