Reply to Middle Age Health Feels like sword of Damocles (Diabetes, cancer scare, HBP, HLDL)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m sorry, OP. Sounds stressful. I am struggling to figure out how you’re obese if that truly is your lifestyle. Were you obese as a kid? [/quote]

Your confusion indicates that you are in the habit of “blaming” overweight people for their weight.

We all have different metabolisms and lives. [b](Your childhood exposures are very much related to adult weight, as are experiences like sexual abuse.)[b]

Try hard to practice compassion instead of judgement. [/quote]

Thank you so much for this.  NP here.  FWIW, my best friend and I kept strict food logs when we were in 9th grade.  I was chubby; she was thin.  She ate WAY more calories than I did.  At least 800-1000 more a day on average.  We started logging our food because she just couldn't understand why it was so easy for her to stay skinny when she always, always ate more than me when we were together.  And I'd be agonizing about whether to have a single scoop of ice cream while she could have a 3-scoop sundae and still see her ribs.

This was in the 1980's when every ignoramus insisted that metabolism was simply a calories in-calories out mathematical formula, and that people blaming hormones and metabolism were just making excuses.

Now I understand and forgive myself so much more.  My brother was sexually abusing me, our next door neighbor regularly exposed himself and peeped in my window, and my parents were both alcoholics.  My system was FLOODED with cortisol.  I wasn't overeating.  My body was trying to survive.

Empathy like yours is much appreciated.

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