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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Over the years DH had almost completely checked out of our marriage. We have kids 11,8, and 7. He no longer does anything one on one with me (date nights, sex, etc). He know longer comes with us when we travel out of town to see family and has decided to stay home the last 3 family vacation.

His only contributions are monetary (he earns very well, I also work), and he babysits the kids when I need to take care of things for work. He is extremely hands off with the kids and they’ve just grown to expect this.

Would you stay married? I have no idea if he’s having an affair. At this point I don’t think I’d even care because due to his checking out I no longer have romantic feelings for him. he says his intention is to remain married until death.[/quote]

You are not telling the full story. How long have you been married? When did this behavior start? How was your marriage and relationship prior to that?

[/quote]

OP here. We’ve been married 13 years. We dated 3 years before marriage living together for 1.5 years. the dating years were great and we were very close with lots of sex. Shortly after getting married he changed and became more distant. He refused to open up about what was going on.

The first 5 years of marriage were ok, not as good as dating but fine enough. Then his distancing began to pick up. For the last 3 years there’s been close to no sex and flat out refuse to participate in family life.

I don’t have a camera in his office but I’ve snooped before. A lot of what he’s doing is working. He volunteers for extra work and side consulting projects to stay busy (we don’t need the extra money). He also has female online friends. I consider these to be emotional affairs. I first discovered he was doing this shortly after we got married and it’s gotten way worse over time.[/quote]

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