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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would have said, "yes' but you mentioned SN. So, no. No more.[/quote]

Op here. In a way, I actually think the SN makes me want another child more. We obviously have more challenges than a family raising two NT children. I hope my adhd child will be okay with time, intervention and maturity, and that his condition will be manageable to him as an adult. But in the case that it was (god forbid) always an issue, or in the event that a family has a child with more profound special needs, I am nervous about putting that experience on a lone sibling both growing up and in adulthood.

I had two close friends with very autistic siblings growing up and I know that, as an adult, there’s a particularly large burden on the one who has no other siblings. Of course it’s rolling the dice that the third child won’t be afflicted with profound special needs. I know it’s a difficult factor to consider, and I wish I didn’t have to think about this, but here we are.

It’s not the main reason I want a third child, but given the family I have, it’s become an unexpected consideration.

I’m not judging my husband for preferring to stop, but just not sure how to make this decision well- balancing my desires and his along with with what I think might be better for our family in the long run.
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I am the PP immediately above this post who said I was in a similar situation and don't regret not having the third. I was concerned about this a lot and still am some days. But at the end of the day, I was nervous to potentially have another SN situation that is more serious. And the fact that my son's got some SN doesn't change my reasons I am glad we stuck at 2; in fact, it enhances them: more money for private therapy, more time, more mental and emotional bandwidth. But everyone's choices are different!!! Wishing you peace with whatever decision you come to. [/quote]

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