Reply to Broken Marriage, Different Places on Where to Go

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do you blame the special needs on her behavior or her genetics? Did her physical appearance change?

You're stating contradictory things: you can hardly stand her physical presence and you can't bear the sound of her voice, but you're cordial roommates who can sometimes even go out jointly with friends? How does this compute? Doesn't sound cordial.

Are you in therapy, OP? The PP who suggested a depression screening is not wrong. Antidepressants can be a total game changer. SN is very hard on the parents and on the marriage, I really empathize as a SN parent. But you can't let that implode everything forever, by and by you gotta be able to dig yourself out.

Acknowledge to her that she wants something else. Tell her you're not in a place to provide that. Tell her what you're willing to do to improve things, even if it's 5% of what she wants. [/quote]

Yes, we're both on antidepressants. I think that's pretty typical for SN parents. I started a couple years ago. And she finally agreed to start a few months ago. No, not a game-changer, but they help.

I don't know why you find the remarks contradictory. As others have said, you do what you have to do in these situations. You can do a lot of group and family activities without much interaction with each other (rather, just with friends and the kids). My idea of cordial may be different than yours. Basically, we can generally avoid fighting.[/quote]

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