Reply to Mourning all the wasted years.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Those years were not wasted if they were spent raising your children  and providing a stable home life for them while you and your husband attempted to navigate your relationship. Even if you end up splitting it's important to give the marriage every possible shot at success.  [/quote]

Agree
Fascinating how little they or their lives, schooling, activities have been brought up. They may even be in college if Op is truly married early 20s and now early 40s. [/quote]

If so, I wonder if OP is jealous?

OP, in all kindness, you sound unstable, was your mom bipolar? You are likely having a midlife crisis.

What would truly be sad is not your lack of "fun random sex" but if you destroy your family and all you have built and harm your own children greatly in the process. You write about your social life with people who value a lot of casual sex, not how your therapy has enabled you to be more emotionally available and connected to your loved ones, in a way your own mother was not able to be. You may want to watch the company you keep, OP. You seem to be gunning to lose it all. You don't seem to have any insight into how the past is still controlling you and your reactivity. It may also be that as hormones shift in perimenopause your genetic vulnerability to the mental illness of your mother is surfacing more clearly.

You think this is the fun, hyper social wants to have random sex better you, but you sound a bit manic and very self absorbed, OP. I'm worried for you and I'm sure your husband and kids are too. You have more than just a trauma history, OP, but a genetic and behavioral one. [/quote]

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