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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Im getting a divorce. That is my answer.[/quote]

DH is an awful communicator. I can’t imagine trying to coparent with him. [/quote]

You already are. However you are also demonstrating to your kids that its ok for you to be unhappy and for a marriage and family to revolve around one persons whims.[/quote]

Nope, right now I do everything and he fades in and out when he feels like it. If he had the kids for some number of days each week or month, he’d have to communicate his schedule and keep up with kids’ activities. [/quote]

I completely feel for you, because two years ago I broke down crying one day realizing that if I left my husband he wouldn't even be able to take care of himself bc I had let our marriage get to the point where it was like yours. Which, as the parent of a kid on the spectrum and wife of a husband on the spectrum, I recognize is VERY easy to do.

Anyway, I started spending weekend days w friends and provided my husband with suggestions for what he could do w the kids while I was gone, like restaurants to go to for lunch or stores to check out. He did that, so then I asked him to be responsible for taking one kid to a sport. Kid missed a few practices, showed up w out proper equipment a few times, but dad was able to step up.

Now we are in the process of divorcing and I see a light at the end of the tunnel. DH is able to handle the kids without me because I let him do so. Is he still a negative unflexible ruminating selfish ahole? Yes. But he is managing with the kids. Do they get less nutrition and less showers and more screens w him than w me? Yes. Do they miss going to things sometimes on his days? Also yes. Does he ever take them to any dr appts, therapies, etc even if they are “his day”? No and I dont expect him to. We live close enough to each other and the school that its not a problem.

But I am sooooo much happier. I have soooooo much more fun w the kids without him around. My kids see me happy and see a “normal” life when it is our time together.  It is absolutely worth the time it took to get here.[/quote]

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