Reply to Why people don't get along with their in-laws?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I get along with my ILs but they are very different from my family.  They are nice people and have treated me kindly but we don't have a lot in common.  Early in our marriage I was more naggy with DH about having to visit and call his parents and siblings.  But I stopped a few years ago.  I just don't really enjoy it that much so why was I pushing so hard?  DH can take the lead and when he wants to call and visit we do.  [/quote]

Again-- treating the in-laws like in-laws instead of like family is NOT the way to have a loving relationship.[/quote]

Highly disagree.

Family- in an open, talkative, healthy family - is years of shared experiences, values, ups and downs and support. The good, the bad, the ugly.

You don’t snap your fingers and suddenly start dumping on your MIL who you only met a few times a year.

And likewise your MIL and FIL shouldn’t immediately start dumping on you since yours “insta-family” with her demands or need for support.

Maybe over time a sense of shared experiences results in a real family feel, but that takes years. And you have decades of that with your family of origin. [/quote]

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