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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t ever check my 15 year old’s phone.  I stopped before high school.  He’s pretty open about things and I know a lot of friends are drinking, doing drugs and even driving without a license. I know some of their parents know but I know my kid has also tried drugs and alcohol.  We are trying to keep the lines of communication open and think that’s more effective than checking phones.  I can’t keep up with what apps they use to communicate.  They aren’t texting.

As for the other stuff, we stopped allowing sleepovers many years ago.  We sleep with our car keys in our bedroom.  I don’t think he’s leaving in the night since I’m the lighter sleeper in the house.  [/quote]

Yikes, I hope you’re a troll! [/quote]

I don't think she is a troll. I certainly think what she is doing is more effective than checking text messages. If she were regularly checking, kid would just change phone behavior or hide it better. Her method involves communication and action.

People who think checking phones is the best line of defense are the clueless ones.[/quote]
If what she's doing is effective, why is her kid so shitty? [/quote]

This was unnecessarily mean. A kid who had tried alcohol or drugs isn't "sh!tty." He's a kid. She knows what her kid has done even without going through his phone. Open communication will always be the best method.

Good parenting doesn't guarantee your kid will never screw up. Doesn't even guarantee your kid won't grow up to be a nasty tw@t on the internet. I have a 16 year old uber nerd type kid who hasn't dabbled yet, but it's not some triumph of my parenting. [/quote]

Because those type of kids will continue to find ways to get their alcohol, drugs, sneaking out, etc….  The open lines of communication don’t work. They just appease their parents while throwing little scraps of info.

My kids friend got caught once and grounded. They even put ring cams on the doors. Kid acted like he knew what he did was wrong and would change, but just goes thru garage window now.  Found another kid driving his parents car as a 15yr old - unlicensed and not sober. Going to parties and having sex with drunk girls. Just a lot of shocking stuff for 14-15yr olds. And what’s crazy is they all talk about it on snap chat like it’s no big deal. Almost seems like assault

I have snap on my phone and can log into both my kids account at any time. You can tell that 90% of teens have no supervision. The group chats are horrific.I don’t say much because I pick my battles on the really bad stuff directly toward them. [/quote]

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