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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, before all else, book a class with Amy Bookwalter, from Rosebud Doula:  http://rosebuddoula.net/. She is a gifted, experienced, highly trained doula and mother of nine, and she crams so much helpful information into her class, it's unbelievable.  I went to her class for experienced parents, for my sixth baby, and learned so much from her.  I thought that could not be possible, as I had read every single book out there, but it is true!

Next, hire your own doula.  Amy has been my doula the last four times, but she can recommend others if she is booked.

Third, choose a caregiver who is enthusiastic about unmedicated birth.

Then read every good book out there.  There are so many, from anything Ina May, to the more mainstream Sears guide and the Lamaze Guide to Childbirth, to all of the positive birth story collections (I appreciate Journey into Motherhood, because each of the dozens of stories ends with the specific things that helped the mother the most), and Hypnobabies and Birthing from Within for the more out there stuff, which i still love, and even Orgasmic Birth and Gentle Birth.

Stay strong and healthy.  Swim a lot.  Rest as much as you can.  Have a great intimate life with your husband, right up to the end.  Have many conversations about what you need from him.

[b]For your calcium supplement, take calcium LACTATE. [/b] And load up on it at the very end.  It is associated with painless labors.  I've experienced them myself, so I am a believer!

I LOVE giving birth.  I think heaven feels like giving birth.  Women were created for this.  It is part of our sexual health to have the privilege of doing it.  It is part of my love life.  Pictures of me in labor could be mistaken for erotic photos--that's how good I felt.

Love your pregnant body, love your husband, love the baby who is the result of your love for each other, and love every sensation as it comes and goes.  Enjoy![/quote]

Calcium lactate considered a Category C drug during pregnancy, dunno why...

This is totally how I felt-- stay POSITIVE! birth is beautiful!-- during my first pregnancy, and I did Hypnobabies, which requires you to stay away from all negative messages surrounding childbirth, but I would say for all the "if you don't have something nice to say about birth, don't say it at all" types that I would have done better to be prepared to cope with pain than to expect pleasure and pure enjoyment. I would say that people who have births that are painless, or orgasmic, or totally lovely are-- worldwide-- very rare and very fortunate. Many of us do have to cope with a great deal of pain. I've never met or read anything by a midwife or doula who says that pain and extreme discomfort during labor are entirely avoidable for every woman, and unfortunately, staying mentally positive is not always enough to deal with that. This is why classes like Bradley that teach women how to cope w/ pain are so successful, and why doulas are so helpful. It's good to remember pain in labor is totally normal and it doesn't mean you've done something wrong, or failed to prepare properly, or that there is something wrong with you or the baby! And it's great to have someone experienced to help you through it. We can't all have orgasmic births, or painless births, or even unmedicated births, but none of these things is a reflection on you as a woman. Best luck, OP! I have already followed some of the advice on this thread for birth #2 and signed up for Rosebud Doula's birthing course, since Hypnobabies was very nice during pregnancy #1 but not for the birth I ended up having, which I experienced as very frightening because I was not "supposed" to be feeling this extreme pain.[/quote]

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