Reply to Kids in high achieving schools

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We actively fight against the teenage rat-race and the stress and anxiety our kids face, but they listen to us about that the same way they listen about eating all 4 food groups, getting to sleep on time, and clothing choices. Which is to say, not as much as we would prefer. But it's an almost daily conversation and we've made deliberate choices about where to live and what activities to encourage/allow in order to put their mental health first. [/quote]

+1
The environment around us sends a different message than we do as parents.  One of our family core values is health and the rat race is not healthy.  I tell them there is space for everyone to be successful.  If they zig, you zag.  We are guiding our naturally anxious straight A Big 3 kid toward a nice Midwest university with high acceptance rates.  It served me well, so I'm a great example of how one doesn't need a top university to be successful.  She can choose a competitive grad school if she wants.  We're not doing the Ivy or bust game, not even in that race.[/quote]

Are you living your vlaues as a [b]non-UMC MC family, or are you setting your child up to not have the same level of wealth that she was accustomed to as a child?
[/b]
[b]Access to grad school and a high paying career is a lot harder now than it was for your generation[/b]. [/quote]

First of all were UC (for generations) and we are living our values.

Second, one child is on track to be a doctor and the other a lawyer.  There are many great medical schools and it's not harder to get in now than in my generation.  KU med is not Harvard, but lots of successful doctors have gone and continue to go there.  She doesn't need Harvard to be a successful doctor.  For my daughter who wants to be a lawyer, I genuinely hope she wants to do corporate law rather than white shoe big law.  I just don't want her to be that kind of person.  I work with many corporate lawyers who have great work-life balance and good UMC salaries.  The younger one may still change her mind.  I genuinely don't believe my kids are at risk of declining in SES.  They will likely marry an equal, and two solid UMC salaries are more than plenty.  They will be fine!

I feel a bit sad that your outlook for your own children is rooted in fear.[/quote]

Are your two in college?   [/quote]

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