Reply to Weekend Vacation While Divorcing?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I didn’t ask for the divorce but completely agree with it. I am worried about the financial fallout but I feel much less anxiety and less walking on eggshells and less waiting for my spouse to blow up. Kids have no idea we are splitting up (although my oldest elementary kid has brought it up probably sensing the tension). Sometimes we get along great. Sometimes it’s just managing the passive aggressive comments, yelling, or bodily nervousness. I would love to have a good coparenting relationship where we can still do things together as a family-holidays, birthdays, dinners, vacations. We are in the beginning stages of divorce and so won’t tell kids for a while since we are still living together.  [/quote]

So he is leaving you. I am sorry. The sooner you accept you are not together, the better it will be. You don’t do family holidays together. This is not how it works.

Sounds like you want to keep everything the same as if you are still a family.[/quote]

You can't divorce away the fact that you are both parents of your kids. [/quote]

Not PP, but I agree. Even though ex and I are divorced, and we do not vacation together-we are still Mom and Dad and our kids are our family. Just because we aren't married to each other, doesn't change that. Families come in many forms as we know.[/quote]

Of course you are still mom and dad. I guess it is possible. I just don’t know any divorced couples who spend holidays, vacations and birthdays together. Almost every divorced couple we know has one person move on rather quickly. It isn’t like both mutually just decided one day to break up the family. One party wants to date or leave the other. Or there is abuse or they just can’t stand one another.

It is never really truly mutual. Same as any breakup. One party usually wants to stay together and one party wants to break up.[/quote]

I am divorced; I don’t know anyone divorced who moved on quickly. At all. Maybe you are young. Divorced in 40s there is not much moving on. It is getting the kids raised but not having to be married. I can stomach kids birthdays and dinners and a beach trip because I am not married and it is a few days a year vs every day of my life. Some people get along much better divorced because they no longer have to be married to the person. [/quote]

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