Reply to Not happy with 16 YO DD's boyfriend

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Omg. He cannot raise his voice at you or your DD. 
This is terrible. [/quote]

Agree but what do you do about it? You can’t force a 16 yr old to break up[/quote]

No, but you can put limits on how much time he spends with her.  This is what my parents did.  They just said it applied to any boyfriend.  Not sure if they knew or not, but it saved me from getting totally sucked in from the guys control.  [/quote]

+1 to this.

I initially liked the PP's idea about a family meeting, but the truth is that this kid has already acted so far out of bounds that a meeting to set limits isn't possible. And it's also not your job to fix his damage.

I agree with PP that there should be time limits on how much she sees this guy. For instance, my 16 year old is dating a guy and I'm pretty open to her spending at his house with him or at our house, but that's because he is a really nice kid! And his mom and I have talked and agree on ground rules for the kids when they are in our homes.

If yelling and outbursts had happened the boyfriend wouldn't be allowed in my home and my daughter wouldn't be allowed to hang with him all the time. I'd suddenly have a lot of family events that couldn't be missed, trips out of town, etc.

I wouldn't make her break up with him but would tell her point blank that him exhibiting abusive behavior towards us/our family makes us worried for her safety and thus the restrictions.[/quote]

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