Reply to 3 years after graduating college time to move out?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DD wanted to move out, she has a good paying job and a good career in tech.  But, we encouraged her to save her money and continue staying with us. Marriage is on the cards soon, and we do not want her to walk into her marriage broke. [/quote]

So she’s never going to live on her own?[/quote]

Why should she?  She has already lived away from home through undergrad and grad. [/quote]

But was she supporting herself?  I agree with pps that having that time when you are full-time employed and living independently is important before living together/marriage. [/quote]

Let’s see…no, she did not earn money during HS by doing a paying job, as she was always busy with internships and volunteer work. In college she got a generous merit scholarship so I think of it as supporting herself. (Even though we had saved for her college, we had to pay only a very small amount).  She made some money in paid internships in college that she used for traveling as well as opened up a sandbox brokerage account.

She is in a high paying career path and quite aware about what she wants in a spouse,  in her career and her family life. Economic emancipation is important for her above all.  Mama has not raised a fool. But, I understand that there is a cultural component to it too. [/quote]

I understand not wanting your daughter to enter a marriage with empty pockets. It doesn't sound like this is the case with your DD. Since she had indicated an interest in moving out before marriage, perhaps there will be regret down the line but it sounds like your culture supports a direct path from the parents' home to husband's. [/quote]

She is an adult and economically independent. Born in this country, she thought that she must do what the rest of her peers were doing, and asked if she should move out.

(My kids have previously asked us if they will be asked to leave the house once they turn 18 because this is what their classmates told them. We assured them that they will always be looked after by us for as long as they wanted.)

Of course, If she was working in another city, it would make sense that she would move.  She has done that for a few months of internships in the past. When we assured her that she can stay and save money, and suggested that it will be a better option to building wealth, she readily agreed. No arm twisting required.

Of course, it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your kids, and if an adult child will be comfortable being in parents house also. I mean some kids cannot wait to get away from their parents and some parents cannot wait for their kids to leave.

Finally, most parents are in better financial situation than their kids and their kids will need help in todays economic uncertaininties to find their footing.  Parents need to step up and help out their children. [/quote]

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