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[quote=Anonymous]My just turned 4 yo was kicked out of a montisorri preschool for disruptive behavior.  They said he'd never sit still at circle time unless in a teachers lap, couldn't keep his hands to himself, would knock over others kids work when bored, constantly wondering around to see what other people were doing etc.  Basically made him sound like a total disaster and recommended a full-time therapeutic program for him

He was in OT (based on their recommendation) and the OT was like uhhhh....that seems really extreme, I would not do that.  So I put him in a play-based behavioral intervention preschool (largely kids without any formal Dx (because they were young and this wasn't a program for severe disabilities) but in general struggled in a regular preschool.  the program told me they got a huge portion of their students from montisorri b/c its just a bad fit for so many kids).  The teachers at this school said they didn't have a single incident the entire year of problematic behavior from him - i'm not saying he never had a problem at the montisorri school, it was just that this school was extremely good at managing little kid behavior, and it showed that in the right setting (play based for him) with the right teachers, he could be fine.  He spent the year practicing common little kid challenges (waiting your turn, staying still when needed, staying task, turn taking,  losing games, transitions etc).

He's now in K at a regular private school and the teachers have reported he's one of the best behaved, a total rule follower, and they would never have suspected any challenges for him if I hadn't said anything.  I'm constantly checking in (the preschool experience getting kicked out was traumatic b/c it was so unexpected and felt out of the blue) and they kind of think i'm that crazy mom overly worried about a kid thats doing great.

Long story to say, early problems don't necessarily indicate long term issues.  Yes you want to address it but so much can change in just one year for a little kid.  He may ultimately need longer term accommodations or supports (which is fine!) or he may just need a different environment/ some maturity / some extra practice.  Take it one step at a time and don't go down the rabbit hole that I did when he was first kicked out.  I so worried that I'd totally f'd up as a parent, that my child was a total disaster and i'd missed it, that there was no hope for an easier future for him if he was already getting kicked out of preschool at 3 etc....it was paralyzing[/quote]

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