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[quote=Anonymous]I would not go through the physical and financial expense of trying to have a child. Lining up a donor egg, finding a surrogate, getting that surrogate pregnant, etc. is going to push you into later 40s and will create an even larger than 10+ year sibling gap. It’s also not a guarantee you’ll end up with a baby. I think you need to close that chapter of your life and decide to enthusiastically live what is meant to happen next.

Get on some adoption lists with agencies, take some intro. to fostering classes and see if it’s for you, and plan some personally fulfilling things in the meantime. I am a lawyer and wish I had time to volunteer as a guardian ad litem for instance. It seems like you enjoy children, so maybe sign up to tutor at risk youth or something. Then be open to what life brings you.

I say this as someone who is an only child and used to ask my parents for a sibling. I also didn’t have many cousins. It was a quiet childhood, but my parents did their best to always let me bring a friend on vacation, host sleepovers, etc. to help counteract any loneliness. I’m now very close to them as an adult and I appreciate that even had they given me a sibling, the result would be a gamble. I know so many people who are not close to their siblings as adults or who are going to become responsible for a special needs sibling. Or their parents resources went to dealing with the sibling’s major issues like addiction, mental illness, etc. I am jealous of people with close siblings as adults, but that is somewhat a factor of luck. Your child will be okay as an only. [/quote]

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