Reply to How involved are your parents and in laws in your child(ren)’s life?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No local grandparents.

My parents are very involved. Visit frequently, have, at various times, taken our children when we are moving and between houses, take them separately each summer for up to two weeks each child, ask about them all the time, know their interests and activities, etc.

My ILs….see the children maybe once a year, never ask about them, don’t want to talk to them on the phone/FaceTime (despite FaceTiming weekly with my spouse), can’t name an interest or activity of either child, actively make up untrue statements about the children if they bother to bring them up, buy the children things they think the children should like instead of getting to know them or asking my spouse what would be appropriate/wanted, impose their image of the children on them if they do speak to them…it’s super fun when your teenager wants to know why grandma and grandpa send her dolls and princess clothing. [/quote]

Op here. Curious what untrue things they say?[/quote]

Utterly bizarre stuff. They will text things to the family text chain like “Jack and Jill’s children just aren’t athletic, it’s a shame.” Our kids play multiple sports, have for years, and the older one made varsity for one of her sports.! Or “Susie isn’t doing well in calculus.” A) Susie isn’t taking calculus, she’s a sophomore, B) she’s great at math, competes on the math team even! Considering I can probably count on one hand how many times they’ve ever asked anything about the children, when they just bust out with these statements with no prompting or context, we are left a little baffled. It’s been happening since the kids were little! Back then it was things like “Johnny isn’t talking much, he’s behind.” Nope. Not a thing! [/quote]

Op here. That's super strange. My parents make up a narrative about my DD, but nothing that nutso. They say things like she's unaffectionate because one time she didn't want a hug, stuff like that. It's super frustrating.[/quote]

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