Reply to Bad Influences — how to limit interactions?

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[quote=Anonymous]Stay at practice. When your daughter behaves in an inappropriate fashion, remove her from the practice and talk to her in the moment. Tell her if you see unacceptable behavior then there is a consequence and tell her what that consequence is. If she does it again, leave the practice and enforce the consequence. Rinse and repeat.

If you are getting notes home from school that she is behaving in an inappropriate manner, talk to her and let her know that you expect good behavior at school. If you get a call or a note sent homer regarding her behavior then there is a consequence. Enforce the consequence if you hear from the school.

If she is behaving inappropriately at home, correct the behavior, give a warning, and then enforce a consequence.

More importantly, praise her when you see good behavior. If she has been getting notes sent home from school or calls, praise her when she comes home without a note or without a call. Let her know that you see her good behavior and that you appreciate it. Let her now when you see good behavior at home. I will say "Good job on completing chore X" when DS does so without a reminder. Or "Thank you for putting your dishes away" when he finishes.

When you see her do something helpful in the house or say something kind or does something positive, let her know. "I love it when you do X" or "That was nice of you"

When you see her do something positive at practice or in a game, say something. "I liked how you did a good job listening to the Coach, that helps you learn and the Coach run a smooth practice." or "I saw you walk away when someone was doing whatever distracting thing. Good job, I know that it can be hard to stay focused."

Praising when you see the behavior that you want is probably more important then correcting the bad behavior. It gives her attention for positive events. [/quote]

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