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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]They should declare bankruptcy. Your DH has to make it crystal clear to his mother that you and he will not be finding their retirement. Your DH should tell her straight to her face that she has to stop spending and become an adult. Does your DH have any siblings who can join the discussion and present a united front?[/quote]

Me again. I see there are siblings who are on their way to being financially useless. Your DH should sit down with those siblings and discuss the dire circumstances of their parents’ massive debt and unrealistic financial expectations. He should also encourage them to develop financial independence by working at better jobs. Do they have college degrees, or what’s their plan? Do they also expect your DH to help them out financially?[/quote]

Op here. Thanks PP for your advice. They do have college degrees in liberal arts. In the back of our minds we’re scared that when ILs are no longer here, we’re expected to financially help. I don’t know how I would approach this subject. Would it be too premature ?[/quote]

Nothing wrong with liberal arts degrees. They can still get full time jobs. If they are not listening to dh, perhaps he can talk to FIl first. Years ago dh and I had an appointment with a financial advisor to track how we were doing towards retirement and if we needed to save more etc. For those of you who are old enough, like the articles they used to do in Money Magazine to give you an overall sense of your financial picture.

To all of us, it is obvious that your mil needs to cut down her spending and that your sils can’t be financially dependent on your in-laws indefinitely.  But it seems like it is not obvious to them. I don’t know if they will listen to your dh. But they may listen to an independent third party which is why I suggested bringing someone in for a talk.

I don’t care how well you and your dh do - having to support four additional adults is a large undertaking as you clearly know. The sisters should be getting full time jobs yesterday. [/quote]

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