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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]FWIW, there are some very vocal posters on this forum who hate their husbands and blame it on ADHD or on ASD or on whatever.  That doesn't mean that the problem is ADHD or whatever.  But it's easy to blame, easier than to blame the husband or the wife or the dynamic.  [/quote]

Yes, the mental health diagnosis IS part of the problem. It affects daily life and impacts relationships significantly. 
And when you're dealing with an adult who refuses to get evaluated, but you research their symptoms and they seem to fit such a diagnosis, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO?

My husband has diagnosed ADHD. He refuses to acknowledge it, but he probably has some type of HFA. BOTH of these things make him into a complete and utter jerk sometimes. Not always, which is why we're not divorced.

It's not possible to take the disorder out of the equation! The disorder is part of the person's character and personality. And a lot of times, these disorders ALSO come with upsides, like hyperfocus on useful work and higher-level critical thinking. Sadly, it's all the other things that come with these disorders that can make life hell for a family: the angry outbursts, the weird control issues and anxiety-triggered irrationality, the constant tardiness, filing late or completely forgetting taxes or other payments, not being able to multi-task at all, not being able to tidy up or sort through and therefore be at risk of hoarding, never putting dinner on the table on time, the lack of empathy, lack of social connections, the risk of self-medicating with alcohol and drugs, the possible addictions to those, as well as gaming or gambling or other topics of undesirable hyperfocus... all these can be consequences of ADHD and/or ASD.

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Don’t forget escorts [/quote]

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