Reply to Anyone had success with an open marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If I offered this to my DH i know he wouldn't take it.  He wouldn't hook up with someone for sex.  He would need to be in a relationship or on a path to a longer term relationship (not a FWB relationship) before he would consider being intimate with someone.

Don't assume all men would jump at this chance.[/quote]

I believe you.

But also, if you allow a man to have an open relationship, there is always going to be somewhat of a relationship included in the sex. [b]Even for someone like me that can have mostly "just physical" sex, the woman I am seeing will want there to be a relationship aspect as well. As long as OP is willing to allow that, it can work[/b].[/quote]

DP. Re: the bold, OP says she does not want his outside relationships to "hijack our life." If there's a "relationship aspect" as you put it, that is eventually going to do some of what OP likely would consider hijacking, even if he doesn't talk to her about his other partner(s).

I don't mean this unkindly but I think she's being a bit naive in thinking that giving her DH a green light to sleep with anyone he wants is going to mean she and he go on in happy partnership in their home for years to come. I know it can happen, but she's not considering that he, like you, may want a relationship and not just nearly-anonymous sex, and that he will bring his thoughts and feelings about his partner(s) home with him.

It would be more honest for everyone involved, her, him, his partners, the children, to divorce now before the kids are any older.

She also describes the DH as fairy traditional, which may mean he would feel that an open marriage is not for him, in which case she needs to be clear with him that (1) she will never have sex with him again, has no romantic feelings for him to try to rekindle, and considers him a parenting partner, friend and financial support and (2) she will say yes if he wants a divorce. She of course should not do what goes against her desires but neither should he have to accept an open marriage if he feels that's not for him. [/quote]

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