Reply to If you are or were a manager that micromanaged to push someone out for no reason

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No one will say they pushed someone out "for no reason." You may not know the reason or consider it valid but if it happened to you, the person had a reason they considered valid.[/quote]

DP but I’m going to argue with you.

If you have a valid reason to not want someone working for you anymore, you should TELL THEM during regular performance evaluations or other appropriate times so that they have the opportunity to fix it.

If they don’t fix it, you can demote or fire for cause, and they might be mad but not confused because you have been clear with them about expectations and they have refused or been incapable of meeting them.

When people are not up front about their reasons, it’s either because:

(1) They are BAD managers with poor communication skills, who are often passive aggressive and afraid of being direct, because they don’t want to be held responsible for use of their authority. They want to use their authority, they just don’t want to be held responsible for it. Lazy cowards, you know who you are.

(2) Their reasons are invalid. They have a personal conflict with an otherwise good worker and can’t leave it outside the office. They are prejudiced. They want to hire a friend into that role. And so on. They can’t directly express these reasons because they are bad and they know it, so they just passively aggressively make work hell for the person until they quit.

If as a manager you think you have a valid reason to be unhappy with a subordinate, you HAVE to communicate it. It’s a fundamental part of your job. The only reason not to communicate it is if the reason is invalid.

(Some people are devious and do a thing where they make people miserable at work, then say “you seem miserable and that’s a problem” then get rid of them for attitude problems. Diabolical, human beings are actually quite terrible.)[/quote]

+1. Who knows why managers act this way? I thought about it a lot during the 2.5 years that I worked for someone who micromanaged me and made my daily existence a nightmare. Interestingly, she did the "you seem unhappy thing" a PP mentioned a lot. I cried almost every day and felt so stuck. Every so often I would say to myself "What if I pushed back? Could I do something different?" And then I would push back and she would double down and it would get worse. I realized after a while that I couldn't do anything to change the dynamic. Some days she would be nice and I would think "maybe she's not so bad," but most days she would make me feel incompetent, pick apart everything I said and did, harass me if I left my desk to go to the bathroom or didn't respond to an email immediately, tell me after department meetings that had absolutely nothing to do with me that I had looked "upset" during the meeting and that was unprofessional, pull me aside and say an important staff member had let her know that they had said "hello" to me in the office and I hadn't said "hello" back and that was unacceptable. I was constantly blindsided. I was constantly trying to "do the right thing" and yet, it was never enough. The goal post was always moving. She was psycho and a huge control freak. I was her only employee (the employee who was in the role before me quit and filed a lawsuit against her and the company for her behavior... but of course the company let my boss continue to be a manager).

I started applying to jobs 6 months in, but it took two years of applying off and on to get another offer. I actually ended up getting a job (two titles higher) in a different department in the company when things reached a peak (the timing was all luck). However, I was so desperate that I went along with a negligible salary increase. I made sure that before I left that I told higher-up in the department how bad my experience had been under her and was happy they did not fill my role (they brought it in someone else at her level to do the work that I was doing and gave that person a direct report). I only stayed in the second job for 1.5 years. The new job was great in many respects (except for the pay), but I was disgusted with the company and always looking over my shoulder afraid of what she would/could do to my career and reputation. 4 years after leaving the job with the bad manager my salary has increased by more than 300%, I work in a functional work environment, and I'm much happier. I'm also sad for myself - for the 2.5 years that I lost working for a deeply troubled person who decided to make me her punching bag for no other reason then that I was an easy target.
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Sorry you went through that hell in that shithole with that diabolical excuse of a woman. I am in the same situation and trying to get out. [/quote]

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