Reply to How to get over anger at parents for not managing $$

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do. It risk your retirement or your kids’ college for your parents. They can go into a Medicaid home. [/quote]

Assisted livings are not covered by Medicaid in most states. [/quote]

There are actual Medicaid nursing homes. They aren't as nice as private nursing homes.[/quote]

But you have to be “bad off” enough health-wise to warrant a nursing home. Nursing homes do not take just anyone. Medicaid may also not approve them to stay in a nursing home if their health issues do not warrant it. There is a real and serious gap in the social safety net in-between independent living and nursing homes. [/quote]

This. It's important to know the difference between nursing homes and ALFs. Medicare/Medicaid does NOT cover ALFs.

It is highly unlikely that BOTH of OP's parents will be medically qualified for nursing home care simultaneously; essentially both of them with severe enough impairments to need constant hands-on care with daily living activities.

OP, FWIW I have an elder sibling who never managed to save a penny his entire life. He wound up taking SS as early as he could, which is under $1k per month and barely covers his rent. Imagine trying to live off that!

Well, I did as others have suggested and looked into everything he was eligible for. He gets Medicare/Medicaid, has a cell phone for free, gets assistance with his utilities, gets "food stamps" that are more than enough for his needs.  There are other services he would qualify for but for right now, he manages OK with a minimal amount of assistance (car insurance.)

Bottom line is all the worrying I did about him over the years was for naught. It does work out after beating on all the government agency doors. He is doing OK. If he winds up needing full-time care he's already Medicaid qualified and can get in a nursing home.

I sometimes laugh and say he's the smart one in the family. He drifted through life with not a care in the world. Now he is elderly, his basic needs are going to be taken care of.  I worked hard and was diligent yet will have to spend down everything I saved just to get the benefits he does!
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