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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks everyone. Just kindness and acceptance gives me an enormous amount of perspective and some calm. In my rational mind, l know that there is an enormous amount of propaganda out there. I guess I just always expected to be "punished" in some way and instead I feel like the poor baby is suffering.

Of course, PP, I just freaked out about folic acid when I started to read your post. I need a grip. [/quote]

I didn't have an abortion but still ended up with a child in the NICU and a premature birth and I felt guilty. That is completely normal. I felt the same guilt in a subsequent pregnancy when I had very unexpected complications that led to an even earlier birth. My kids have SNs, so more guilt there.

However, I think you need to seek help in dealing with your choice. I don't doubt at all that at the time it seemed like a logical decision. But once you actually see a baby (which you wouldn't in an early abortion) suffer, it can definitely make you feel depressed and guilty. You now understand better what the "other side" of your choice might have looked like, and that it overwhelming in and of itself. I think that if you come to terms with your decision and the fact that at the time if was the right choice, you will likely be a better parent. Don't try to seek absolution from an anonymous message board, especially not DCUM.

Sending good thoughts your way, I hope your baby gets discharged soon![/quote]

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