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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, we literally cannot control other people. This person is not going to apologize and no one in the bigger group is going to make them or change their own behavior toward them. These are facts.

What helped me was choosing not to give them any more time or energy or space in my head. That is what people mean by let it go. You have magnified what happened over years and it will continue until you choose to change your thinking pattern and energy around it.

When people behave badly towards me I try to practice gratitude that they have shown me their true colors. Then I keep them at a distance and am minimally civil if they need to be in my life or I cut them off.

I do not know your spiritual practice but I literally thank God for the people he has removed from my life. It created space for others, some of whom (not all!) were kinder and more worth my time and emotional investment.

You are choosing to make this person and their behavior one of the most important features of your life, for a decade now. You can make a different choice. Have a plan, when your thoughts go to him/her, think of something else, say 5 things you are grateful for. Literally train yourself to give him/her no thought. [/quote]

Did OP say it's been a decade?  I thought just several years. I mean, a long time either way, but this comment confused me (the advice is pretty good though).[/quote]

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