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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here’s where I am on this: I truly don’t know if he’s being defiant or if this is involuntary behavior. I lean toward disciplining him but I fear if it DOES up end being a cognitive impairment and he cannot control this, I would feel horrible to make him feel shame for something he cannot help or fix by himself. At this rate we would not be able to evaluate him for months because of the waitlists. I just don’t know how to approach it/what to say to him (be kind/understanding or firm/disciplinary) in the meantime. 
-OP[/quote]

You've said he's sensitive. Is he typically defiant? Do you recognize that for someone to be capable of doing this ALL day long in school, there is probably something else going on with him? Even if he is "choosing" to do this as a manner of self soothing, what is making him feel so "off" that he needs that level of soothing?

The people saying to discipline strike me as very old-school, and not in a good way.

Even if there's a waitlist for a private neuropsych (which is typical even in non covid times), how about meeting with the school counselor? Or a private counselor? Talking to your ped?  [/quote]

We are already on several waitlists. We are not taking this lightly, nor do I believe the teachers/other students should have to put up with his behavior. My dilemma is how to approach it with him in the immediate term (between now and when we get a diagnosis) since I do not know if he truly cannot help his behavior. Like I literally don't know what words to use with him (disappointed? understanding? inquisitive?). I of course want to be compassionate toward my child and not make him feel bad for who he is, but I also don't want to be blind to this possibly being immature/behavioral (and changeable) antics if I would only know the right things to say to him or "discipline" to get him to realize he has to change this now. I dread him being expelled and what that would do to his psyche. I am feeling desperate to not allow anything like that happen in the new few months before we can get a diagnosis (or not) to know how to proceed. 
-OP[/quote]

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