Reply to Do you give a more expensive gift for a more expensive party?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I send gifts based on how many of my family are showing up and participating/eating at the party. When kids are little you always get at least one parent, but if both parents and/or siblings show up you got to send a bigger gift. Think of your lunch cost. I threw a bparty once, and a person who had rsvped for 5, brought a $7 gift. It felt so disrespectful.

I think one kido and one parent are ok with an $18-25 gift. Otherwise, add a few dollars per person.

Another example: party at the bowling alley, you bring 2 kids. So alley + pizza cost double. You have to be thoughtful about how many were invited and how many you’re sending and how much extra that’ll cost the host. [/quote]

This is really odd.  Are you throwing larger/more elaborate parties than you can really afford, so the "return" in gifts means so much to you?
If your kid does not get enough nice presents, maybe skip the party and buy presents?
I mean, I spend quite a bit on our annual holiday party, I don't expect gifts at all for that.  Some people bring a bottle of wine or some cookies but I really don't expect it.[/quote]

Is it odd because you tag all your family along?

It’s not about what you except. It’s about good manners. Little ones can’t be dropped off, and if you ask to bring the whole family, you put the host in a tough spot, because they have to accept you all or none.

If you had to hire outside help for the kids not attending the party, you’re basically looking for a free ride at the party.

Anyway, because a party is more glamorous, ir shouldn’t change the gift budget, but if the invite comes for Larla and you send the whole squad, then you need to step up your gift. Think like every child you send needs to send a gift.

[/quote]

No, I would never bring siblings to a party if they were not specifically invited.  I think that is your issue, not the lack of gift.  A gift is something freely given, not an admission ticket per child.

Honestly, I have had parents ask to bring a sibling and I am always fine with it.  I have had other children give my child clearly secondhand gifts because it was all they can afford and that is fine. And I do "no gifts" parties once my kids are old enough to really understand the idea and not be bothered by it, especially at larger parties, because we have enough stuff already.[/quote]

I only remember two gifts from all my children’s parties. One was this $7 crap gift. It was probably a regift. Another was a beautiful book that my kids loved for years. I don’t remember what the book cost, but it was a very thoughtful gift, because it wasn’t just any board book.

Anyway, at a minimum, I always give a gift receipt or a gift card. Usually between  $20 or $30. If I find a $50 toy on sale for let’s say $32 after tax, I get it and ‘ignore’ the budget.

And no, I’m not worried about getting gifts, or don’t mind hosting the siblings, but I believe in showing some respect for the host. At a birthday party you show it with a thoughtful gift. I’m general it doesn’t have to be expensive, but $7, $10 can only get you some junk. If you don’t accompany that with a gift receipt, you’re basically creating frustration for the host who has to deal with a frustrated child playing with a garbage toy, and/or have to take care of that trash.

I’d prefer I get nothing than a piece of junk. [/quote]

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