Reply to Why are some girls so lucky in love and others struggle?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have had the same frustrations you have had. My friends who all seemed "lucky" in love were girls who had a combination of 2 things:

- Inherent good looks. It requires a lot of work and dedication to look the part of an "attractive woman." Girls who are genetically blessed have a leg up. Before learning to style and groom yourself, your true raw beauty shows through. Having been born pretty means that even when you're 19 and haven't quite figured out how to apply proper eyeliner, your raw beauty helps attract a pool of guys before you even really try. So from an early age you get exposure to male attention and desire and from experience, and self confidence, you learn to sharpen your picker and select the best guy to settle down with. These girls aren't necessarily super models...but they meet society's beauty standards: thin, long shiny hair, nice eyes and figure. Working out, makeup and styling takes them to a whole other level.

- Innate femininity and nurturing qualities. This is more than learning how to wear dresses or apply perfect make up. Its being feminine and early on. Babysitting, being a teacher or helping raise 4 little siblings. Affinity for dogs and pets. And yes, interest in  beauty and styling. Soft and feminine. Guys want to court and date a GIRL. They had a knack for dressing to attract attention. Red lips, a little bit of thigh here, high heels. Guys were putty.

Literally every woman I know who is married or happy married possesses these qualities.

[/quote]

Ha well consider me the exception! I am happily married and I’m not like that at all. I am a five, six tops in looks if I don’t make an effort, and I am not nurturing, soft, or feminine. Well I am nurturing but really only toward my own kids. I actually stopped wearing heels when I started dating DH because he is on the shorter side and only six inches taller (which I guess suggests some kind of femininity but still).

I have a fun personality, I’m smart, I’m nice to people, I listen to DH, we have good conversations, and DH thinks I’m a really good mom to his kids. I have a good body but if I didn’t I probably would have just married somebody less attractive.

I still think it’s mostly just luck. I didn’t cultivate any of those qualities, I was just born with them, and DH is just seriously committed to cultivating a quality marriage. [/quote]

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