Reply to Question for "strict" parents out there or believe they have very high standards for behavior

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Question for "strict" parents out there or believe they have very high standards for behavior"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I let eye rolls go. I let mumbling under the breath go.  If I tell them to go do something, and they go off to do it while grumbling, they're still doing it.  And that's good enough for me.  I do not want to create a situation where they can't vent their anger or frustration.

I'm strict about safety, about cleaning up messes and being organized, strict about being kind, strict about enforcing boundaries, and about high-quality apologies. But if you want to stamp up the stairs grumbling that you HATE getting dressed, go right ahead. I hate putting on a bra and real pants instead of pj pants too, buddy. I feel you, 100%. [/quote]

This is the right answer right here. Kids are allowed to express their displeasure. They’re human beings. My mom was insane about not allowing any sort of eye rolling or any other form of “rude behavior”. Thankfully she doesn’t get it anymore from me and my two siblings because we don’t ever see her. Now I hear she whines about how she can’t believe we have abandoned her.  :lol: [/quote]

+1.  My parents were super strict and I really don't talk to them.  Personally, I follow the approaches outlined in Whole Brain Parenting and No Drama Discipline.  Works for us and great for relationship building while teaching children how to be people.  [/quote]

I follow this book too. I think the parents who are too strict have issues with what they perceive as lack of control and they don’t know any other ways of addressing those issues. So they latch onto perceived slights like a huff or an eye roll. People like that are always looking for ways that they feel others have slighted them even when it’s not their kids. They also have very rigid and black & white thinking when it comes to the world. [/quote]

Your mom didn't accept rude behavior so you've determined she was a less than perfect mother and then you... don't see her anymore? Presumably she fed you, clothed you, educated you, rejoiced in your successes and suffered your hurts.

Bad karma lady. Your children will follow your example. [/quote]

Authoritarian parents rarely have close relationships with their adult children. It is common for children raised by parents like that to have poor emotional regulation, poor self esteem, and issues with authority as they get older. It is usually better for kids raised like that to cut ties in order to heal their trauma.

https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/authoritarian_parenting_style

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics