Reply to Aspergers, fighting and contemplating divorce

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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. I need to point out that there are many voices chiming in here, it's not just the OP so don't assume it's just one person. I label my posts OP. DCUM is funny, to the person who asked why multiple therapists? Like another poster 1 fired us because of husband's massive outburst, another suggested a specialist. The others the chemistry wasn't right and one gender turned out to be better for us. There were good reasons why we got together. With typical middle aged life's challenges and a person's true colors come out.

"I have a feeling you are letting him get away with a lot and failing to stand up for yourself and then feeling resentful and dealing with it in a passive aggressive way. You say you "deal with" verbal abuse--you mean you stand for it? I feel like you need to work by yourself with a therapist who can figure out how to set boundaries."
How much if the day can you fight with someone? This comment gave me a chuckle. Boundaries are set regularly. I am quite clear.

Thanks for the links. The topic of neurodiverse couples navigating marriage is new. I like the book by Eva Mendes on Amazon. Best thing I have read, especially compared to the websites with so many angry spouses-I identify with them but dont learn anything. Eva's book has good strategies. To those who have written "it's not just ASD" -Yup. That's why the title of this post is "Oppositional". The therapists have said something else is going on. And, things are always more complex than you can explain in a post. 
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