Reply to Four Children: All Living on Opposite Coast

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Nothing wrong with it of course. But This is why we (selfishly) discouraged our kids from considering college on west coast. There are plenty of options on east coast and chances of them getting first jobs and settling closer  to where they attend college is high.

I can handle a few states difference, I’d be emotionally torn if we were all cross country from each other [/quote]
Agree with you that this is selfish. Deliberately lessening your kids’ opportunities for your own wants, not cool. [/quote]

NP. First of all, I don't see how you can consider it "limiting" to stay somewhere on the east coast. The east coast includes NYC, DC, Boston....
Also, kids often choose on a whim to live somewhere very far away from their parents, and then they build kids and a life in this arbitrarily chosen place, and then realize how hard it is to be away from family. (I'm talking about myself!) I think it's good for parents to advise their children to stay reasonably close by because it might be very advantageous in 10 years when they start having kids.[/quote]
It isn't limiting if the kids choose. The point is that they should be able to choose.
Also, "kids" (we are actually talking about adults, but ok, we can say "kids") sometimes realize later they don't want to live faraway after all, but sometimes they don't change their minds. Point is, it's their choice and if it 's a mistake, it's their mistake to make. Maybe they never would have understood the benefits of being close to their parents if they'd started that way and felt suffocated. Who knows? It's fine to give advice, I guess, especially if it s requested. But the PP said they [b]discouraged[/b] their kids, which sounds like more than advice. Purely based on what she wanted, not on what her "kids" might want. That is selfish.[/quote]

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