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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.

[b]I am skeptical of anyone who says that none of their friends ever do this.[/b] I think sometimes friends can go through good times where there isn't much competition and where people get along well. But if you have women friends for a long time, I think you inevitably hit patches where rivalry comes up. Again, I've seen it in friends from every era of my life at some point or another. I'll be rolling along great in a friendship and then something will shift -- someone starts a new relationship, work gets stressful, someone's marriage is on the rocks, etc. -- and dynamics change. I am struggling to think of a single female friendship I've had that hasn't had a phase like this.

I'm not saying women are naturally competitive or that all my friends are always insecure and jealous. Far from it -- I love these women. They are funny, accomplished, kind, interesting. [b]But this dynamic always comes up eventually.[/b] It is particularly present in my life right now. I wonder if it is a mid-life crisis thing. Most of the women I know are late 30s, early 40s, and I see a lot of people assessing where they are at in life and sometimes lashing out, and other times getting smug. They are both ugly behaviors.

I also don't know if this is unique to women. But I'm a woman and while I have friends with people of all genders, I only notice these dynamics in my female friendships.[/quote]

I absolutely agree with you, but also I believe women are naturally competitive. Why wouldn't we be? Men are competitive with each other in terms of money, sports, status, sex.

While women are innately hive-minded, we also compete to maintain our standing and hold-on to our resources. When we're younger, we tend to focus on our attractiveness and ability to secure a mate, which can impact female friendships if we're hunting at the same watering hole. When we have partners or spouses, we compare them to those of our friends. As we age, we compare our resources--careers, money, homes--and our families. We shouldn't feel bad about entertaining these normal thoughts. It's only negative when we or others in our friendship-circle are insecure, resentful, need to dominate, and sabotage other friends.

As another PP mentioned, I think it is easier to maintain healthy female friendships when there is some diversity in the group. And if there is someone who has any of those negative traits mentioned above, by all means, end it. 
[/quote]

If women are so competitive, why are 88% of billionaires men? Why are the majority of CEOs men and why do women drop out of the workforce at the drop of a hat?[/quote]

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