Reply to Why do parents feel they have a say in the choices their adult children make?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Because old habits die hard.  They had a say in what you did -- indeed, they were responsible for your safety and well-being -- for two decades, give or take.

Because they love you and are worried about you.

Because they are afraid of something bad happening to you.

Because it's really hard to watch people make mistakes, or what you think are mistakes, and not say anything.

Because they want to share their experience and wisdom with you.

Because they feel like no one values their experience and wisdom any more.

[/quote]

+1, especially the "old habits die hard" part. Many parents have trouble seeing their adult child as a grownup. My parents openly tell me they still see me (40 year old CPA and married mother of two) as that same pigtailed 6 year old in the photo on their mantel. [/quote]

+2, OP will definitely do the same when she is older. Her kids will be on a similar forum complaining. We all do it. It's part of the cycle. In short, they do it to annoy you. And they have succeeded :)[/quote]

Plus, I'll say right now that I will never let my kids on a motorcycle. I don't care how old they are. They can be 50 and I'll drag my 80 year old butt over there to scream at them. A dear friend was hit by a car while riding his motorcycle. It was a brutal death. To this day, I will never forget the sound of his mother screaming, and it is why I purposefully break the engine of any motorcycle my kids ever try to buy. They'll always be your babies. [/quote]

You think this is evidence of a very close, healthy family, but it's actually terribly dysfunctional.  I know I'll never convince you of that, of course . . . but that's just another symptom of the lack of boundaries.  [/quote]

I laughed out loud at this post. If you think keeping kids off of a motorcycle is terribly dysfunctional, I'd say that your grasp on reality is wanting. It's a dangerous vehicle which has high incidences of death when in accidents. This is not keeping kids from going on spring break or majoring in art history. Secondly, I've at no point come to DCUM to rant and rail against my parents. I've not moaned about my relationship with them and/or how they are in or out of my life. So tell me again about family dysfunction, OP. [/quote]

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