Reply to Biggest Contributions to "Happy Marriage"?

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Reply to "Biggest Contributions to "Happy Marriage"?"

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[quote=Anonymous]She doesn't need to show you her data.  I have nothing in common with the crazy nine baby lady.  NOTHING.  FT working mom - in BigLaw, God or whatever diety save us all - with two kids, only because I got too tipsy one night and told DH there was no way I could get pregnant at that time of the month.  Oops.  We planned to stop at one.  We've got the nanny and the dogwalker and the yard guys and the kids in 400 afterschool activities.  I mean I am the crazy working mom stereotype.  C9BL is shaking her head as she reads this.  I mean, how much more different could I be (and suck)?  We try to talk about bringing spirituality into our lives occasionally, but we are just too damn tired.  C9BL would probably run the other way if she met me in real life.  But even I see a lot of valid points she makes.  Plus, it obviously works for them, so accept that and be happy they found their path, ok?

Back to the OP's question:

Realizing that "happy" comes and goes.  To C9BL's point, I used to be a poster on here who talked about "crushing sadness."  I hated my husband.  HATED.  Wished his plane would go down when he went away on business trips.  I wish I were making this up.  But, as it turns out, people grow and change, even to the point where the person you loved and married, then hated more than you ever thought it was possible to hate someone, the person you decided actually had no good qualities, the person you thought so little of during that awful multi-year stretch, has within them the possibility to become the person who is suddenly hot, your soulmate, and the one to whom you tell everything and with whom you discuss everything.  I don't know what I would do without him, even though five years ago I would have given anything to be rid of him.  If I knew that then, maybe the low would not have had to be so low and painful.  Maybe I could have seen a better path through that, and maybe he would not have become my enemy.  Perspective and maturity - huge helps in a happy marriage.

Oh, and laughter and sex.  Of course.  [/quote]

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